Archive for the ‘the web’ Category

This is what we’ve done with the Internet.

February 15, 2010

I have the ability to see what search engine terms people have used to find my blog, so after the onslaught of visits I’ve received in the last 18 hours (80), I decided to take a look. You can imagine how satisfied I was to see this:

I mentioned the 100:1 or 50:1 (whichever you prefer) penis to boob ratio in my previous post, but it looks like people are trying to forego mathematics and see some internet boobs the easy way. Now if only there was a manual written telling us just how to get some hot boobage on Chat Roulette. Top mathematicians at MIT will be figuring out the exact equation for maximum boobs. Until then, this brave patriot compiled a Who’s Who of sorts in the world of Chat Roulette boobs (NSFW). I wonder how long it took to compile this data considering, after roughly 22 man hours spent on Chat Roulette, I only saw about 2.

Chat Roulette: A Rouletrospective.

February 14, 2010

By now, everyone in the world has heard of Chat Roulette, or as the French call it, “chatroulette.” After three nights of voyeuristic webscapades, I realize that Chat Roulette has done nothing to help move the Internet forward. I remember the promises of video-phone technology during the whimsical early-90s. This tool would help us reconnect with our long-lost family members, Grandma in Kentucky would get to see her grandchildren in Albany grow up right before her very eyes. Unfortunately, video-phones, if you don’t count Beyonce’s killer track, never got the play they deserved. Instead, we skipped over that entirely and now video-chat has become accessible to college kids and grandmas alike. Sure we have Gchat and iChat and all sorts of other IM devices that allow you to speak to your friends and family face-to-face, but where’s the fun in that? Everyone knows that video-chat is best served ice-cold and anonymous. Forget Gchat, we’re now in the (week-long) era of ChatRoulette.com.

For everything Chat Roulette is capable of, the general public only seems capable of shitting on potential world peace — not literally. The anonymous nature of the Internet brings out the worst in people, so why not use this amazing device as a way to call someone ugly or ask to see some boobs. When I was 14, if there was a way that I could see free, anonymous boobs, I would totally demand it at every turn. Of course, I was only capable of picking fights in the Yahoo chatrooms while supposedly doing homework in the computer lab at math & science camp. Taking that into consideration, it’s nearly impossible to meet someone who actually wants to have an interesting conversation on Chat Roulette. So this weekend, my friends and I had fun with it and met some pretty rad, and often weird, but more often bored, people. As the minutes became hours, we sang, we screamed, we ridiculed, and one of us even found (internet) love.

I should also mention that we saw at least one hundred wieners. Unfortunately for my 14 year old self, there’s a 100:1 penis to boob ratio — or would it be 50:1 since we saw a pair of boobs?

If there’s anything revolutionized by Chat Roulette, it’s gotta be the screengrab. I’ve included a ton of those after the jump. Some will make you laugh. Most will make you cry.

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one more reason to move to texas.

November 18, 2009

Just as I declared otters to be the new cats, I saw this:

Okay, kitties. You win!

Memes come true.

November 18, 2009

Otters. Baby otters.

I think we’ve finally replaced the Keyboard Cat and the Sneezing Panda.
2010 is going to be a great year.

 

These otters were ahead of their time:

shhhhhhhhhhhhh.

October 3, 2009

This vlog blog should get the award for best vlog blog in the universe—if such an award existed. Check out SF Secrets and you’ll see what i mean. I’m going to make my way down to Tyson Glass today and get my cat fix with Little Bitz.

you knew this was going to happen.

September 16, 2009

going viral, the cat under the faucet tells us what he thinks about the incident at the VMAs involving a certain gay fish.

boldly going where no cat has gone before…

September 15, 2009

I want to be the first to call it, partly because I know this will be on/is already on every blog worth reading. The new interweb cat sensation is Cat Putting Head Under Faucet. I didn’t think we’d ever get something to replace the keyboard cat. Still, Winston easily takes the cake.

I expect to see remixes, Internet!

the internet boycotts cats?!

September 8, 2009

urlesque is organizing an international internet boycott of cats set for 9.9.09. tomorrow.

After getting inspired by our friends at Asylum, Urlesque is organizing a web-wide ban on cat-related coverage on9.9.09 — A Day Without Cats on the Internet. Why only one day? Well let’s be honest, that’s probably only as long as we’ll last before a hilarious video comes crashing into our inbox. But for one day, we will abstain… for you… for the cats.

to get a head start on things, i decided to whip up this short video. what two elements do you need to make a dog on a trampoline melancholy? slow-mo and a patrick swayze ballad, of course.


UPDATED: 15 more seconds!