Archive for the ‘comedy’ Category

I’m back—or something.

November 14, 2010

Hello from beyond the grave!

Just kidding. I’m not really dead — in fact, I’ve been very much alive. Those of you who’ve been following my Twitter and Tumblr know very well that I’ve maintained my online presence. Some may rejoice over my return to WordPress, others may shake their heads. That said, I’m finished neglecting my blogging duties. You people (yes, you people) deserve to know what I think about pop culture, film, music, the media, and farts, and I fully intend to deliver.

Since my epic — and epically dated — Chatroulette post, I’ve relocated, enrolled in grad school, read more cultural theory than I can remember, and acquired a new kitten and a taste for delicious, delicious whiskey.

Stay tuned for my next, more substantive post about the postmodern wonder that is The Venture Bros.

Until then, I leave you with the genius of Chris Morris, director of Four Lions:

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This is what we’ve done with the Internet.

February 15, 2010

I have the ability to see what search engine terms people have used to find my blog, so after the onslaught of visits I’ve received in the last 18 hours (80), I decided to take a look. You can imagine how satisfied I was to see this:

I mentioned the 100:1 or 50:1 (whichever you prefer) penis to boob ratio in my previous post, but it looks like people are trying to forego mathematics and see some internet boobs the easy way. Now if only there was a manual written telling us just how to get some hot boobage on Chat Roulette. Top mathematicians at MIT will be figuring out the exact equation for maximum boobs. Until then, this brave patriot compiled a Who’s Who of sorts in the world of Chat Roulette boobs (NSFW). I wonder how long it took to compile this data considering, after roughly 22 man hours spent on Chat Roulette, I only saw about 2.

Chat Roulette: A Rouletrospective.

February 14, 2010

By now, everyone in the world has heard of Chat Roulette, or as the French call it, “chatroulette.” After three nights of voyeuristic webscapades, I realize that Chat Roulette has done nothing to help move the Internet forward. I remember the promises of video-phone technology during the whimsical early-90s. This tool would help us reconnect with our long-lost family members, Grandma in Kentucky would get to see her grandchildren in Albany grow up right before her very eyes. Unfortunately, video-phones, if you don’t count Beyonce’s killer track, never got the play they deserved. Instead, we skipped over that entirely and now video-chat has become accessible to college kids and grandmas alike. Sure we have Gchat and iChat and all sorts of other IM devices that allow you to speak to your friends and family face-to-face, but where’s the fun in that? Everyone knows that video-chat is best served ice-cold and anonymous. Forget Gchat, we’re now in the (week-long) era of ChatRoulette.com.

For everything Chat Roulette is capable of, the general public only seems capable of shitting on potential world peace — not literally. The anonymous nature of the Internet brings out the worst in people, so why not use this amazing device as a way to call someone ugly or ask to see some boobs. When I was 14, if there was a way that I could see free, anonymous boobs, I would totally demand it at every turn. Of course, I was only capable of picking fights in the Yahoo chatrooms while supposedly doing homework in the computer lab at math & science camp. Taking that into consideration, it’s nearly impossible to meet someone who actually wants to have an interesting conversation on Chat Roulette. So this weekend, my friends and I had fun with it and met some pretty rad, and often weird, but more often bored, people. As the minutes became hours, we sang, we screamed, we ridiculed, and one of us even found (internet) love.

I should also mention that we saw at least one hundred wieners. Unfortunately for my 14 year old self, there’s a 100:1 penis to boob ratio — or would it be 50:1 since we saw a pair of boobs?

If there’s anything revolutionized by Chat Roulette, it’s gotta be the screengrab. I’ve included a ton of those after the jump. Some will make you laugh. Most will make you cry.

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You should be sitting down for this….

January 14, 2010

This is totally a two for the price of one deal!

Check out the new Dan Deacon video/short film for “Woof Woof,” off of 2009’s Bromst album. This was made by my dear friends over at Showbeast. It totally just premiered on Pitchfork. This is a very big deal and I’m very proud of everyone involved.

I strongly suggest you watch and enjoy this video.

home alone for a new generation.

December 24, 2009

This is possibly the best use of Twitter in the history of Twits. Check out the Home Alone Twitter Project. It’s kind of funny.

[slashfilm]

…for my mom.

December 9, 2009

Here’s a pretty funny blooper reel from season 5 of Lost.
I wouldn’t say it contains spoilers, but if you care that much, don’t watch it.

the best marketing ever.

December 1, 2009

Louis CK is easily one of the most underrated contemporary comedians, with stand-up so good that we can forgive him for making Pootie Tang. He’s got a new show coming to FX in March with some very NSFW press to go along with it. I hope this one’s a lot better than Lucky Louie.

Enjoy (with headphones)!

A new adventure—of healing.

November 24, 2009

This week’s The Venture Bros. drops us knee-deep into an adrenaline-pumped thrill ride as we pick up the episode in the middle of an ever-satisfying chase scene. In true Venture form, this has nothing to do with the episode.

Read about it after the jump!

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See you at the party, Richter!

November 17, 2009

Oh, mama. The /film blog just posted a really amazing video of every death in Total Recall. I commend the editor for this amazing piece of work. I’ve been complaining for months now that we need a substantial database of all of the murderdeathkills in Governor Schwarzenegger’s movies. This is a great start!

WARNING: CONTAINS SPOILERS!

The recession is an asshole.

November 17, 2009

Finally. Months after continuous viewing of season two, Metalocalypse returned to Adult Swim for another season of unadulterated brutality. I inadvertently watched episode 2, “Tributeklok,” before the premiere, which did me no good. Under the impression that “Tributeklok” was the season premiere, I was left disappointed in the direction of the series, feeling that it was a weak return that made no effort to address the cliffhanger ending of season two or the story arc that spans the series. I was wrong.

Bear in mind that this is my first recap, and it’s very long.

(spoilers and screengrabs after the jump).

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