Chat Roulette: A Rouletrospective.

By now, everyone in the world has heard of Chat Roulette, or as the French call it, “chatroulette.” After three nights of voyeuristic webscapades, I realize that Chat Roulette has done nothing to help move the Internet forward. I remember the promises of video-phone technology during the whimsical early-90s. This tool would help us reconnect with our long-lost family members, Grandma in Kentucky would get to see her grandchildren in Albany grow up right before her very eyes. Unfortunately, video-phones, if you don’t count Beyonce’s killer track, never got the play they deserved. Instead, we skipped over that entirely and now video-chat has become accessible to college kids and grandmas alike. Sure we have Gchat and iChat and all sorts of other IM devices that allow you to speak to your friends and family face-to-face, but where’s the fun in that? Everyone knows that video-chat is best served ice-cold and anonymous. Forget Gchat, we’re now in the (week-long) era of

For everything Chat Roulette is capable of, the general public only seems capable of shitting on potential world peace — not literally. The anonymous nature of the Internet brings out the worst in people, so why not use this amazing device as a way to call someone ugly or ask to see some boobs. When I was 14, if there was a way that I could see free, anonymous boobs, I would totally demand it at every turn. Of course, I was only capable of picking fights in the Yahoo chatrooms while supposedly doing homework in the computer lab at math & science camp. Taking that into consideration, it’s nearly impossible to meet someone who actually wants to have an interesting conversation on Chat Roulette. So this weekend, my friends and I had fun with it and met some pretty rad, and often weird, but more often bored, people. As the minutes became hours, we sang, we screamed, we ridiculed, and one of us even found (internet) love.

I should also mention that we saw at least one hundred wieners. Unfortunately for my 14 year old self, there’s a 100:1 penis to boob ratio — or would it be 50:1 since we saw a pair of boobs?

If there’s anything revolutionized by Chat Roulette, it’s gotta be the screengrab. I’ve included a ton of those after the jump. Some will make you laugh. Most will make you cry.

Click images for a full size shot.

Chat Roulette is best shared with a group of friends. Generally, while surfing the chat alone, it’s easy to look bored and lonely. To combat loneliness, we sang a song — granted, the lyrics were “show us your wiener.”

The screengrab doesn’t capture it very well, but this dude was singing/pantomiming a heavy metal version of Kelly Clarkson’s meta-hit, “Since You’ve Been Gone.”

I didn’t grab any penises, but if you really want to see some go ahead and visit the site. I guarantee within the first five clicks you’ll see a flaccidly erect penis being stroked and flopped. What you will not see every time is this man’s late night homage to bestiality:

The internet is still very fond of cats (and dogs), by the way.

photo courtesy of Egg’s facebook

There will always be creeps on the web.

not pictured: man’s furiously flicking tongue. photo courtesy of eggs’ facebook

You may also learn a thing or two about yourself.

Part of me suspects that this is just a viral marketing scheme put into place by those notorious union-busters at Coca-Cola.
But don’t be discouraged. There are some genuinely nice, friendly people on here. You just have to wade through the muck to find them.

photo courtesy of Eggs’ facebook

And finally, you know that saying, “If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.” Yeah. That. Just remember that it’s all in good fun.


One Response to “Chat Roulette: A Rouletrospective.”

  1. This is what we’ve done with the Internet. « felix incognito Says:

    […] felix incognito heavy. « Chat Roulette: A Rouletrospective. […]

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