…We’ve all been there. You know, those days where you just want to eat the fuck out of some taco bell or McDonald’s or you just want a whopper. There is definitely something inherently wrong about these places, and I’m not talking about weight gain. I think about my blood flow, my heart, my DNA — but I know that eating faux food every once in a while isn’t such a bad thing. It keeps me in line and I don’t sell out to the foodies of San Francisco. When everyone judges the lower class for eating fast food, I understand that sometimes you need to eat a meal for under $4 and there aren’t daily farmers markets in the ghetto. But I still sneak in and out of Mickey D’s, feeling the foodies’ judging eyes. Even now, while confessing these urges to the Internet, I feel the guilt tingling my hands as I type. Maybe that’s the heart disease. Do your hands tingle when you have heart disease? That seems like something that should happen.
Fortunately, I’m not alone. Even celebrities, such as uber-famous comedian, Michael Ian Black, fall victim to the hunger. Michael explains his thought process while visiting a taco bell out of convenience:
The other day I told my wife I was going to the bank, which I did. But then I also went to Taco Bell without telling her. I felt extremely guilty about that, like I had betrayed some kind of trust. I had, but it was with my lower intestine, not with her. When I got back, she didn’t ask why the trip had taken so long and I didn’t volunteer the information. Had she asked, I would have told her and she would not have cared but it is hard to maintain emotional neutrality about Taco Bell; I don’t think there is a person on this earth who can say, “I just ate at Taco Bell” without wincing.
Click the link to read about a few of my favorite heart-stopping popular fast food joints (in no particular order). (more…)
